Bobbins!

I've never understood why grown men adore Lord Of The Rings. Maybe it's some regressional thing, reminding them of their first 'big book.'

And never in all my life have I heard such bobbins spouted about a film - or three films, in this case.

I sat through the first one at the cinema, but rain-checked on the second and third ones, figuring that perhaps one day I'd catch them on TV.

And when they duely appeared on my Sky viewer schedule on Channel Four over the last two Sundays, I stayed well clear.

But I did see the end of the third one. The bit where the ginger one arrives back at his house with-the-door-the-looks-like-the-end-of-a-sewer-pipe, and hugs his wife and says the Middle Earth equivilent of 'Hi honey, I'm home.'

And that was it. It all turned out well. What a relief.

But only then did I read about the rift between Peter Jackson - the director who brought Tolkein's 'masterpiece' to our screens - and New Line, the company which made the films.

Apparently, he'd been expecting to make The Hobbit and another, yet-to-be-concocted prequel to the Rings trilogy (here's a mad crazy thought for Hollywood: Trying making a series of films in the right order! If it's not Star Wars Part I coming after III, IV and V, it's the new James Bond telling the story of how he got to the point where the other films could happen).

But now he's been told he's no longer needed. They're getting someone else. Perhaps they want someone to give it a darker edge. It worked with Batman.

Or maybe it's more to do with the fact that Jackson, who made £200m out of directing the three films, was threatening legal action because he didn't think he had a large enough cut. Well, £200m doesn't stretch far these days. And, after all, Frodo Baggins fought tooth and nail to get the ring back, so it's almost natural Jackson hunts his treasure.

New Line turned round and apparently said 'Drop the lawsuit, and we'll give you the last two films.'

Jackson has said no, because: "Deciding to make a movie should come from the heart and not be a matter of business convience."

Which kind of makes you wonder why he was so worried about getting that third £100million, doesn't it.

As for me, I'll wait for these two prequels (apparently New Line will have to pay more to go back to New Zeland to film it if they don't use Kiwi Jackson) to turn up on the telly. And then I'll just hope a repeat of Hollyoaks is on elsewhere.

Hobbit? Bobbins